I hope everybody had a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Surprisingly, I managed to get some time off of work. I had the week off from the 17th to the 21st! I made appointments and ran around, did a little Christmas shopping. The 18th was the 2 year anniversary for my moms passing...I suppose I will take the day off each year. I honestly thought I would be OK this year but these things have a funny way of sneaking up on you.
I started crying at my dentist appointment and when I was getting my caterpillars, I mean my eyebrows, waxed. I volunteered in Maddie's class one day and started crying when one of the teachers walked past wearing my mothers perfume. I shouldn't be allowed to leave the house.
I can recall when my mom was dying sitting in her living room with a pad of paper and a pen and writing down the simple things she used to make for special occasions wanting to kick my own ass for not paying attention sooner. I used to help her cook, but I didn't think I had enough confidence in the kitchen to just wing it, so I wrote everything down. I did not think to ask for the recipe for her pies, the crust especially. My sister has it and apparently does not feel I'm entitled to such information...anyhoo, for this year, and last as well I have made Thanksgiving dinner using my sheets of tear stained directions to create a meal like my mom would have made...with a few differences: 1. no pie 2. surgical gloves so I can touch the turkey without gagging or throwing up.
Thanksgiving is a time for families. My family consists of Maddie and me. We will create our own traditions. I set the table with fine china, polished the silver. Maddie made the center piece. We had a beautiful day together and I feel blessed.
3 comments:
I am glad that you got some time off, but sorry that the anniversary of your mom's passing hit you so hard. These things do sneak up on us. I have had similar experiences, many times, in the past year and 3 months. Perhaps it's that much harder, since it falls right before the holidays.
You and Maddie are a beautiful family. Setting a lovely table, cooking your favorite dishes, using your mom's recipes and the love that you have for her and Maddie, helps to enfold your family with love, and makes traditions for the two of you to share and pass along. God bless you!
I am sorry to hear about you losing your Mom. that is tough. We never pay enough attention to our parents until it is too late, that is normal. You are right to start new traditions with Maddie...you both can make them up as you go.
I hope you are better emotionally soon. take care,
suz.
ps. silver/ fine china? You rock.
I absolutely LOVE your Thanksgiving tradition. Your beloved sweet girl will have these memories forever and once older, she will be grateful for them, and I'm so in love with the fact that with all that you had going on you made that effort for her and for yourself. I'm also with Sue...fine china/silver...awesome!!!
I'm sorry it has been a while since I've commented here, but that doesn't mean I haven't visited often. I hope your Christmas plans are coming along!
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